THE PHRASE: „LET GO“

„I’ve never understood this. I spent ages overthinking it and ended up frustrated because I just don’t get it.“

WHY A NEURODIVERGENT BRAIN DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THIS PHRASE:

Lack of concrete instruction: The brain needs precise, tangible steps (like a software command). „Letting go“ is an abstract state without a manual—there is no physical switch for it.
The Velcro function of working memory: Incomplete or unresolved thoughts are held tightly in the system. Trying to simply drop them feels to the brain like being asked to ignore physical pain or immediate danger.
The meta-rumination loop: The phrase creates extra pressure. Instead of letting go, the mind now loops around the original problem plus the frustration of not being able to follow the advice.

Neurodiversity Ping #2

THE WISH: „MAY ALL YOUR PATHS LEAD TO BASIC TRUST“

„Made me angry.“

WHY THIS WISH CAN TRIGGER ANGER IN NEURODIVERGENCE:

Ignorance of lived reality (life biography): The neurodivergent brain and body have often learned that the world is unsafe, overstimulating, and full of barriers. The wish demands a state that completely contradicts lived experience.
The pressure of toxic positivity: An absolute, perfect spiritual expectation („all paths“, „basic trust“) that leaves no room for justified caution, skepticism, or exhaustion, but instead judges current feelings as inadequate.
Attack on the defense mechanism: The often necessary hypervigilance (constant alertness of the nervous system) is not a flaw, but a shield. The wish indirectly demands dropping this shield without the environment actually being safe—which alarms the system and turns into anger.

Neurodiversity Ping #3

THE PHRASE: „FEEL ALL YOUR FEELINGS“

„I feel almost dumbfounded. How is that supposed to work. I don’t want to feel fear or pain.“

WHY CLASSIC FEELING EXERCISES ARE UNSUITABLE HERE:

Missing volume control (overwhelm): Emotions often arrive unfiltered and with full force (from zero to a hundred). There is a lack of an internal buffer, which is why „feeling through“ instantly leads to panic, overload, or a meltdown rather than processing.
The dysregulation trap: Without an automatic internal anchor, the emotion pulls the entire nervous system into a whirlpool from which it is very difficult to escape alone. The system therefore rightly classifies the exercise as dangerous.
Resource depletion: Since the neurodivergent brain is already running under high voltage in everyday life, there simply is a lack of energy for such uncontrolled emotional intensities.

Neurodiversity Ping #4

THE PHRASE: „DON’T THINK SO MUCH“

„I’m offended. I enjoy doing that so much. Why shouldn’t I think so much? I don’t understand the statement. What is positive about thinking less then? So what is the sender trying to tell you with this?“

WHAT THE SENDER ACTUALLY MEANS (AND WHY IT HURTS):

The desire for relief (from the sender’s perspective): For neurotypical people, „thinking less“ usually means: *„Don’t worry, don’t ruminate over half-baked things, relax your brain and trust that it will turn out fine.“* It is meant as reassurance or an invitation to ease.
The core conflict (deep thinking as identity): For a neurodivergent brain, deep, analytical, and interconnected thinking is not an annoying bug, but a feature—a source of joy, creative problem-solving, and deep understanding. The request to think less therefore feels like the accusation: *„The way you function is wrong / too exhausting.“*
The paradox of the instruction: The brain cannot „not think“—it is constantly working. The phrase offers no solution, but instead invalidates the rich inner experience and classifies it as an error.

Neurodiversity Ping #5

THE PHRASE: „TAKE A DEEP BREATH FIRST“

„Feels like this completely misses my reality and that I’m in the flow and right now don’t need this break.“

WHY THIS PHRASE IS WRONG AT THIS MOMENT:

The hard stop in hyperfocus: When you are deep in the flow, the brain is running at full throttle. Sudden advice to slow down does not feel calming, but rather like an abrupt emergency stop that destroys the entire train of thought and the structures built with such effort.
The external control of energy: The phrase implies that the other person knows better what you need right now than you do yourself. This ignores your own reality and the fine intuition that you are currently fully capable and in the tunnel.
The frustration of the disruption: Instead of triggering relief, the instruction creates stress because you are yanked out of a positive, productive state even though you actually felt completely good and in your element.

Neurodiversity Ping #6

THE PHRASE: „EXHALE. TAKE A DEEP BREATH.“

„How now?“

WHY THE SEQUENCE AND THE INSTRUCTION CONFUSE:

The logic error in the sequence: The instruction begins with „Exhale“. However, anyone who exhales first has no air left in their lungs before inhaling and is forced to gasp for air in a panic. The brain stumbles over this illogical process.
The overload of body awareness (interoception): In many neurodivergent individuals, the perception of interoceptive signals (how one’s own body feels from the inside) is expressed differently. The command „Take a deep breath“ is too abstract—it doesn’t state *how* deep, where to (chest or abdomen?), or in what rhythm.
The effect of control pressure: Suddenly, you are also supposed to concentrate on the automated bodily function of breathing. This does not lead to relaxation, but creates control stress and the feeling of failing at breathing as well.

Neurodiversity Ping: Imagine Future

Neurodiversity Ping #7

THE PHRASE: „IMAGINE YOUR FUTURE AND IT WILL COME TRUE“

„I understand the sentence, but I feel resistance to sitting down and imagining my future. Somehow overwhelming.“

WHY FUTURE VISUALIZATION FEELS OVERWHELMING:

The blockage by the abstract „big picture“: For many neurodivergent brains, creating a rigid, long-term vision of the future is too abstract and vague. The system simply doesn’t know which detail to start with, which immediately leads to mental paralysis.
The inner resistance to the pressure of expectations: Sitting down and picturing the future as „successful“ or „right“ doesn’t feel like freedom, but like an unwritten mandatory task—and the brain blocks under artificial performance pressure.
The emptiness of imagination (aphantasia or focus on the here and now): When the brain is wired to live in the present moment, in hyperfocus, or in concrete problem-solving, looking into a distant, hypothetical future feels like a completely foreign, hard-to-grasp language.

Neurodiversity Ping #8

THE PHENOMENON: WHEN SERIOUSNESS MEETS IRONY

„The ’smile‘ when I take something seriously. Other people tend to make fun of it, and a close acquaintance also liked to relish it and make fun of why I didn’t understand it (‚irony‘). Because they understand it. So I should too.“

WHY THE EXPECTATION OF IRONY UNFAIRLY HURTS:

The operating system’s filter setting: Many neurodivergent brains process language and social signals primarily directly and literally (bottom-up processing). Subtle, unspoken meta-layers like irony or sarcasm often fly under the radar—not out of a lack of intelligence, but because the brain does not default to scanning for hidden pitfalls.
The unfair power dynamic of gloating: When others make fun of you for taking something literally, they are exploiting an unfair advantage. They demand that a system wired differently adapt flawlessly to their own unwritten rules instead of respecting the difference.
The painful „I should understand this“ dictate: The pressure that you „ought to understand it anyway“ generates artificial shame. With the knowledge of one’s own operating system, it becomes clear: It is not a weakness, but simply a different, honest way of perceiving the world and communication.